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Sunday 28 December 2014

Köln and Düsseldorf

This time, I decided to explore little bit more of Germany. So, went to Köln and Düsseldorf. Köln is known as one of the most beautiful cities in Germany. So, I was over excited. However, things turned out different. At the end of second day, I preferred Düsseldorf to Köln.

So, it depends, what you want to see in the city. Of course everyone has their own preference. If you just want to wander around the town, relax a bit and get a feeling that you are in Köln than that's ok but when I go somewhere, I always want to see what's there to offer because city centres in Europe are same everywhere, whether you are in France or London or Hannover or Berlin. I wanted to see something unique of each city.

The main attraction in Köln is Cathedral. The construction of the Cathedral started in 13th century but was finished in 19th century, not because people then were slow or something but the construction was halt for some reason. If you go to Köln via train, you don't even have to ask people where it is. All you have to do is, get out of the train station and it stands right in front of you. The Cathedral has 19th century decoration and is so tall that you have to bend your head completely back to see its top. Some people might think that its good that they don't have to go that far but for me, I think it is in wrong place. Ok, lets correct it. The train station or other houses were built in wrong place. Since, its Germany's most visited landmark and world heritage, its obvious that people do visit it but I found it overcrowded. I would have liked at least small open area around it. 
Cathedral from  outside

Inside Cathedral
Another highlight of the day was riding a cable car. The Rhine river separates the Köln into two parts and by cable car, you can travel from one part to another just in 7 minutes and it only costs you 4 Euros. 
Crossing Rhine river via cable car
Rhine river
Next day was Düsseldolf. I found it more beautiful than Köln actually. In the city centre of Köln, I felt like I was still in Hannover city centre but in Düsseldolf, it was a different feeling. Even walking in the city gave me an impression that I was in different place. Walking along Rhine river was even more exciting. 

The main attraction in Düsseldolf is Rhine tower (Rheintrum)There is a bar and lounge at the height of 168 m in the tower. View from there is magnificient and it was worth spending my time there. I stayed more than I intended to but still it wasn't enough for me. Aparently there is a restaurant called 'Top 180' at the height of 172.5 m, which rotates at its own axis and makes a complete rotation in an hour. So, that means, you can revolve 360 degree and see everything just by sitting in one chair in that restaurant. Unbelievable right? Well, if you don't believe it, check it here on youtube. Wow!! just think about it. If you are in food business and want to start something interesting, there you go! Make a restaurant like this in main attraction like Rhine Tower and you are sorted! I would have loved to experience this but unfortunately, I was only aware of it after I left but there is always next time :). 
View from Rheintrum

Friday 28 November 2014

The Catcher in the Rye by J.D Salinger

My Review: 5/5

This is one of those books I wish I had written instead. I wasted many precious minutes now and then thinking and asking myself why I didn't read this book before and then realised instead of wasting all those precious time thinking why I didn't read, I should have spent it reading. You see that's the problem with small brain. When I say small brain doesn't mean I am stupid or so. I am talking about age. I didn't read it because this book is for adults only. At least I wouldn't let my children read it until they are 18. Oh please, when I say this book is for adults only, don't bring dirty thoughts into your mind. Its nothing like that. Its just that I am more concerned about the languages used in this book. So, now since I am adult or so (mentally), this book came in perfect time. You know someone said the way its meant to be. Normally, things don't happen if they don't want to happen. I think this time, it wanted to happen. Boy, this is crazy life. I think I am going mad here. I tell you beforehand, I am a madwoman.

When I write this review and you read it, I assume that you all are adults and that means you have all experienced your teenage life and you know what I am talking about. Now lets all go back to our teenage time. Do you remember when things were better and you were smarter? when I say that, it doesn't mean I mean to say you are not smart and things are not better now. You are but there are times when you think you are smart even though you are not. You believe you know everything. You are annoyed with people around you. You make rules for yourself. You want to be rebellious. You may or may not be wrong but even if you are wrong, you don't care. We have all been there and we have all seen that sort of things. 

So, this book talks about the mind of teenage people. Holden Caulfield, our main character has just been expelled from a school. He has his own meaning of life but the thing is he doesn't know what to do with his life. He decides to leave home for change but later changes his mind to stay home just for his little sister. Holden is very protective of his younger sister even though he himself is bit careless about the life. He is worried about her future. That certainly reminded me of my teenage time. I don't remember much about my teenage time apart from some things such as I was always worried about my future. I was always nervous about it but when I was not nervous, I used to get nervous thinking why I was not nervous. I tell you what, teenage people are the most vulnerable people. When you become parents, you have to make sure to handle your teenage child well. Wish there was some formula on how to do that, where you can just substitute something and find the value of 'x' and you know what to do like 'tadaaa'. I had a bunch of close friends I used to hang out with all the time. You see this was the thing, some of my close friends had elder brothers and sisters. When I read about Holden and his sister, I remembered them. Whenever we wanted to go out, we either couldn't go out or even if we did, we had to come home early just because my friends were scared of their elder siblings and because they were scared, I was scared too. Boy did that annoy me. Thank God, I don't have elder siblings. Oh may be its bit harsh. To tell you the truth, there were some times when I wished I had elder sister or brother, specially those times when I needed guidance in my career and those times when I needed a family talk about my problems. You can't discuss everything with your parents. Most of the time, you are scared you will be grounded. The funny thing is, I totally understand those siblings of my friends because I am also an elder sister of two brothers. I tell you what, one of my brothers is already married but I still worry about him. I swear even when we reach to the age when I can't walk on my own, I would still worry about them. Its hard to be an eldest child. Parents always blame you for your siblings' mistake. Once in a while, I went crazy and wished I had elder siblings just so that I could blame them for all my and my brothers' mistake. Boy, am I madwoman.

Once I was asked a question, "how do you decide what is wrong and what is right?". Boy do I know that answer or does anyone know that answer. You see the way I see is, we have our one life, and in this life, there are so many ups and downs. Sometimes you have to be strong but sometimes you have to let it go even though you are strong. Sometimes you have to be harsh but sometimes, you know one of those times when you don't want to do anything but sit by the river and stare at it flowing or sit on bench in the park and watch people passing by? Just let your life pass it like that. Sometimes, we make decision ourselves but sometimes we make decision based on our surrounding. Its not a sin to be rebellious. Specially in the place where humans are ruled by the society, where you have to think about the society before you think about yourself. But what I don't understand is, some crap man made rule just because it was convenient for him that way, now everyone has to suffer for that. I mean obviously I don't mean to go against everything. There are obviously things which are good but there are also bad things. The funny thing here is, the things I find bad may not be bad for other people and vice-versa. I don't mean to sit here and give lecture on what the societies should be, the thing is you have to first think about yourself and families, then society because you make the society not the other way round. But the problem here is, people make the rules but they don't obey themselves. What I say is, no one knows your life better than yourself. You have to work on it yourself. You have to decide what is wrong and what is right yourself. When I say this, I didn't mean to disobey our parents. Family is important. I am just talking about general things here.  

I was meant to write a book review but I think I got carried away. Boy, was I bored. Just don't sit here reading my hopeless crap. Go and get this book! I warned you right? I am a madwoman. I mean it and I mean it when I mean it.

Saturday 22 November 2014

The best of me by Nicholas Sparks

My Review: 3/5 

Ok, This is Nicholas Sparks' book. So, the first condition is, it should be a love story. Second condition is, the story should be heartbreaking. The book is mainly based on:

Can fate give us second chance ? 

The high school lovers: Dawson Cole, comes from a family of hooligans while Amanda Collier comes from a wealthy and high class family. So, you can get the picture: their relationship was unfavoured by her parents. At that time, Dawson and Amanda both become society victim who seems to decide who they should marry. Although my society is also similar to this, I never understood why people decide on how you should live your life when you yourself have never interfered on theirs. I am sure the person himself or herself is more capable than other people in choosing their life partners. Oh well, this is how society rules and once you don't stand for yourself, you will be the victim forever. 

Anyway, going back to Nicholas Sparks' book, after nearly 25 years of separation, Dawson and Amanda have been given second chance by fate by bringing them together in their mutual friend's funeral. In that long separation, Amanda is married with 3 children whereas Dawson has never been able to think about another girl than Amanda. He is still waiting for her (Aouch!). So what happens when they meet? Will they come back together? Will Amanda leave her family to be with Dawson?

The story is great and there are some scenes where you can't hold your tears. I mean it's just unbearably tragic but c'mon! you don't always have to end it in sad way. I think Nicholas Sparks has this mentality that unless the story is sad, it won't be hit. They say unsuccessful love stories are remembered forever. May be that's how it works around here. On the other hand, this is the love we are talking about. Its blind and stubborn at the same time but love itself is not always ruled by ourselves. Its the society sometimes and its the families. Dawson and Amanda did get second chance and this time, they knew how to become one forever. They struggle with themselves and then with fate and then with destiny until Dawson's heart is forever with Amanda.  

Line that touched my heart:

 "Sometimes, though, she wondered what he felt when he thought of that year they spent together, or if he ever marveled at what they'd shared, or even whether he thought of her at all."

Wednesday 12 November 2014

A Bend in the Road by Nicholas Sparks

My Review: 3/5

I liked it but it was a very uncomfortable read. I remember when I read Dear John, I was completely in love with the characters, John and Savannah. I was completely engrossed in the book as if Nicholas Sparks was telling my own story. A bend in the Road, however was different and I confess, as much as I was sympathetic towards the characters' situations, I didn't fall in love with them.  


It is the story about the true love and forgiveness. Miles Ryan, a local sheriff's life has turned into hell since his beloved wife, Missy was killed by hit-and-run vehicle. What is making Miles' life worst is, the driver of the vehicle is not known yet. Then he meets his 7 years old son's teacher Sarah Andrews, who has recently moved in the town after a terrible divorce. Through his son, Miles meets Sarah and before they know, they are in love. 


So far, story sounds good. Now, let me tell you what was the thing that was making me uncomfortable throughout the book. Miles, who was deeply and madly in love with his wife is not letting her memory go off. So, even when he is with Sarah, he is remembering her, talking about her. I understand he wants to find the killer but thinking about Sarah, poor girl was not even getting a full attention from him. When I think about Sarah, I go like 'Who would want a guy like that?' but when I think about Missy, I go like 'Awww, he is so cute. Missy was so lucky :D'. Anyway, this is a girl talking but whenever I read Nicholas Sparks, I keep wondering "Are there really guys out there who would love one girl forever?" All of his male characters are like this :). Anyway going back to being uncomfortable, so throughout the whole book, Missy is remembered but he is dating Sarah. Obviously he wants to move on. He wants to find someone new but seriously, it was just too much. I felt really sorry for Sarah. Oh! by the way, the book was quite predictable as well. The killer is kept suspense until last minute but before half way through I knew who the killer was. Not many characters in the book. So, it was an easy guess. Anyway, one thing is for sure, Nicholas Sparks certainly knows how to describe love.


Here is my favourite paragraph from the book:
'We used to spend hours just talking about everything, or about nothing. It didn't really matter. She loved books and she used to tell me all the stories she was reading, and she could do it in a way that made me want to read them, too. I remember she used to read in bed and sometimes I'd wake up in the middle of the night and she'd be sound asleep with the book on the end table with her reading light still on'.

Tuesday 11 November 2014

Memoirs of Midnight by Sidney Sheldon

My Review: 1/5

Very disappointing that book was!

A typical Sidney Sheldon book about love, revenge and jealousy but I hate to say this book didn't live up to my expectation and author's reputation. More than anything, I definitely didn’t like the ending at all. 

It starts off interestingly with a girl who has a mysterious past. I thought Sidney did it again. The interesting thing about this book is, you have to read it till the end to know how bad it is. I was completely glued to this book just to be disappointed at the end. 

Constantin Demiris (known as Costa) is eager to get a revenge on Catherine (our female character) after her ex-husband (Larry) nicked Costa's mistress (Noelle). He had framed both Larry and Noelle for killing Catherine and because of that, they were executed. Now he is determined to kill Catherine but before that, he wants to do the same thing to her that Larry did to Noelle but in revenge way. Then he starts treating Catherine like a princess claiming to be her ex-husband's boss, and she blindly follows him without any question. And OMG! she is super boring and crying all the time. I have read almost all of Sidney's books but never found a woman like her. All of the sudden he decided to make the woman the weakest character. 

Finally Catherine finds out that Costa is behind all her trouble and he is the one who killed her husband. I thought then bang!! Now something interesting is going to happen. Now she will do something. Now she will be real Sidney's heroine that we have always known but NO!!! Nothing happened there. They didn’t even encounter and the climax of the story is something surprising but in disappointing way. 

But this is Sidney Sheldon. It’s his writing. He can make black white and white black. He has that magic to glue his readers to his books. So, I was there reading anxiously that something good will come up. The one thing that kept me reading was I wanted to find out what Melina Lambrou (Costa's wife) was going to do to her husband, after everything he put her through. What she did was expected and clever but her stupid brother ruined it. What I don’t understand is how come Sypros Lambrou saves Costa from going to jail after knowing that he is the main reason for his beloved sister's death. Obviously there is wealth involved and Sypros got greedy. This was totally displeasing. Why Sidney?? Why Why Why?? My heart goes out to Melina. I am probably reading too much of Sidney's book. I guess I need a break!

Sunday 2 November 2014

The Naked face by Sidney Sheldon

My Review: 5/5

Dr. Judd Stevens is a successful psychoanalyst in Manhattan. Listening to people and helping them out by connecting with them mentally and psychologically is his job. Talking about emotions, he is also falling in love with one of his mysterious patient: Annie. 

Suddenly, John Hanson, one of Judd’s patients was mistaken for him and murdered. The same day, Judd’s secretary, Carol is found killed in the office. Two detectives, Angeli and McGreavy are assigned to the murder cases but to McGreavy, Judd himself is the prime suspect. To prove his innocence and track down the real killer, Stevens hires a detective Norman Z. Moody but before he could prove his innocence, Moody is killed and series of attempts are being made to murder Judd. 

Now, Judd has a big job ahead: save his life, track down the real murderer, prove his innocence and find out why he is being the target. 

Is it one of his patients? or someone from outside world? He doesn't know. There is no evidence, no clues and no witnesses. All Judd can do is go deeper into the maze of murder mystery and use his knowledge of human behavior to imagine the killer from the way people are murdered and the attempts made on him 

The book is very well written. As the story progressed, all I thought about is who the murderer is and why he or she did it? I was biting my nails throughout the book. The story is splendid and the way Sidney writes, Oh my God! We need more writers like him on this earth. 

Manchester Derby: Manchester City 1-0 Manchester United

Holly suffering cats!!! No idea what on the earth was on Smalling's mind. At 39th minute, United was down to 10 men. 

Still the game didn't go as bad as expected. It was a typical Derby game. Very competitive and very enjoyable. The game we always know about. Everyone was doing their best but just that it was an unlucky environment. Rooney was great too. Anyway, it was nice to see him after long time. On the other hand, I was hugely impressed by De Gea. Some magnificent saves he made there. So proud of the team!! What a test for United and they carried it out perfectly well!!

Without a doubt, my man of the match is De Gea. 

The Doomsday Conspiracy by Sidney Sheldon


                                                                
 My Review: 5/5

The Aliens are invading! The world is dying! They are killing us!
World's industrialization is the problem for Aliens. They think people are destroying  the earth due to all chemicals  released from the industry. So, Aliens have demanded the nuclear and manufacturing industries to be stopped. They have warned that unless people agree to do so, they will invade the earth. Now, the secret agencies from the strongest countries of the world have come together and formed the secret organisation 'Operation Doomsday' to fight against the Aliens. The operation is hidden from the world in order to avoid public panic.

One day, while making a trip to the earth, UFO consisting of 3 aliens crashes in the Alps of Switzerland. 2 out of 3 aliens die and one gets lost. The incident is witnessed by 10 people. Now, the Operation Doomsday is eager to find those 10 witnesses and stop them from spreading the news. Commander Robert Bellamy of US Naval Intelligence  is temporarily recruited by NSA for this assignment. His job is to find those 10 witnesses without consulting with anyone. Dutifully, Robert innocently finds those witnesses one by one but after each time Robert locates, the witness is mysteriously killed. Robert is unknown about this fact until he hands them the final witness and his own life gets in danger.  

Now, Robert is trying to save his own life. His own friends have become enemies. There is no place to go to and no person to trust to but the only thing he has is the skills and intelligence. Robert once had training in US Naval Intelligence to avoid the circumstance like this. Now, whatever he learnt from them, he tends to use on them.  

I felt deep pain for Robert when he unfolds the story of the only woman he ever loved and will ever love. He had her but because of too much of work away from home, she slowly slips out of his hands and ends up marrying someone else. The annoying thing is, she comes back to him at the end. Robert should have found someone else. She should have suffered as much as Robert had. Oh well, it feels nice to read about happy ending though. 

After reading almost all of Sidney's book. I kind of knew beforehand that this book consists of suspense with many twist and turns but never ever expected Aliens, UFOS and scientific fiction from him. It totally blew my mind! Without a doubt, he did a great job. 
  
ps. Do you know what inspired Dan Brown to write thriller fiction? The Doomsday Conspiracy. Just wondering if Dan Brown named his character Robert Landon because of Robert here. Sidney is getting another point for this.  

Sunday 26 October 2014

BARCLAYS PREMIER LEAGUE: Manchester United 1-1 Chelsea

WOW!!!

I was waiting for this match for a long time and without a doubt, it met my expectationYou know what, when Van Persie scored in stoppage time, it was an emotional time for me. Until that time, De Gea was my man of the match, and I seriously thought Jose Mourinho got away with that.

It was a great game and well deserved scores. We could have won but draw is always better than losing. I remember how United degraded last year and equally boring were their games. Now, things have changed. With new manager and £150m investment worth of new players, we have a quality squad. Di Maria, our £59.7m investment is definitely someone to look for. He will shine as he has always.

Chelsea looked very organised and confident from the beginning but on the other hand, United worked very hard. Although Chelsea look stronger this season, United challenged them with their hard work and winning mentality. Chelsea actually had to wait for corner to score, but that is corner, where players come on the way of goal keeper and poor goal keepers are lost in the crowd. Then came incredible equalising by Van Persie with his left foot. More than equalising, it was time for Van Persie to prove himself again and he did it magnificently. He still needs to improve his games though but I know when Rooney is back, everything will be alright :).

United is slowly getting used to their new tactics. Still lacking in defending position but in games like football, there is always room for improvement even though you are a winner. On the other hand, Jose Mourinho has definitely worked hard this season but lets not declare the winner now. As Van Persie said- 'We still have more than half of the games left so we can still catch Chelsea'.

Monday 13 October 2014

Bloodline by Sidney Sheldon


My Review: 2/5
The story starts with the death of Sam Roffe that is thought to be an accident. He is the director of the world's biggest pharmaceutical company, founded and established by his great grandfather, Samuel Roffe. There are three main rules of the company:

1. Its stocks cannot be sold to outsiders.  
2. Only family members are allowed to be the board members. 
3. The director has the controlling stock.

The company is a global success until all the board members are desperately in need of money. They try to pursue Sam to sell the stocks but Sam following his great grandfather's footsteps doesn't agree to sell it. Then someone from board members deliberately tries to bring the company into bankruptcy so that company would go to public and he or she could get money by selling the stock. However, Sam still disagrees to make the company public and as a result, he is killed. His only child, Elizabeth, takes over chairmanship and figures out that his father didn't have an accident but was killed. Now, she cannot trust anyone in the board members since she knows one of them killed her father, is destroying the company and now is after her life. Can she find out who that person is? Can she save the company? Here is the little tale of brave heroine again. 

However, Mr Sheldon left some loose threats this time. It was like one of those time when you solve mathematical equation and don't understand how you solved it. I felt like towards the end, he ran out of ink or paper and just wanted to end the novel by picking up something that doesn't flow with the story. The ending seems very unorganized, and when the suspense was out, I was like WTH! very disappointed indeed! I think Sidney Sheldon completely lost his interest in the story in middle. 

Saturday 11 October 2014

A stranger in the mirror by Sidney Sheldon


My Review: 5/5
Mr. Sheldon does it again! Another breathtaking story about love, betrayal, vengeance and murder. This is bit different than his other books but I really enjoyed it.

Toby grew up with an idea that he was born to be famous. On the other hand, Jill grew up dreaming about being rich and beautiful. Soon, both realize that the only place that gives them what they want is Hollywood.

Both of them have to struggle to reach to the top. The part that describes their struggle is really heart touching. They have to lie, face humiliation, get rejected and sell their bodies until they get chance. Soon Toby becomes the superstar and the king of Hollywood but Jill is still struggling until one day they cross each other's path. Despite their age difference, they fall in love. Toby wants to marry Jill because she was the only girl who ever rejected him but Jill wants him because getting Toby's power is the only way to punish all the people who have used and rejected her.

They rise and rise as a Golden Couple of Hollywood until the love turns into betrayal and betrayal influences vengeance. The hounding carries on until they come together again, and until their love story is written forever by the stars that are only visible to soft night wind and the timeless sea.

Sidney Sheldon gets 5 out of 5 again from me.

Monday 6 October 2014

The Sky Is Falling by Sidney Sheldon

My Review: 5/5
 
This book is lot lot and lot better than its prequel 'The Best Laid Plans'. It has Sidney Sheldon written all over it.

So here is the synopsis: All five members of one of the most popular and reputed families in the America are dead in a year. The deaths seem to be an accident for others but not for Dana Evans who has curious mind. She is beautiful, smart, young and brave anchorwoman at Washington television network. According to her, the deaths are just too much to be coincidence and believes there must be some unsolved mysteries. She beings an investigation on her own way. Now, each page has some suspense and mysteries to solve. There are twists everywhere and the unsolved mystery takes Dana all over the world, meeting almost all the ambassadors or politicians before it all makes sense. Slow by slow; she starts digging out the truth until her and her adopted son's lives are trapped in danger. Finally, she reaches to the point where there is no one to turn to and no one to trust on. What will she do? Will she be able to outwit her chasers and expose the hidden truth to the world? Will she prove again she is the brave one and all of her instincts are right?

One thing where it failed to impress me was, there was no good purpose of her adopted son and her fiancée and his ex-wife. I thought it was just making story unnecessarily long and Dana was just being too busy getting involved with their lives. But, this is Sidney Sheldon. His dominant character has to be a female. On the other hand, it was good to know about Russia's hidden town Krasnoyarsk-26. I didn't know it exists until now. 

I was hugely entertained by this book. Once Dana starts her investigation, I couldn’t put this book down. I was going to give it 4 stars but I changed it to 5. One star is in to say I am Sidney Sheldon's fan.

Wednesday 1 October 2014

Sidney Sheldon's Mistress of the Game by Tilly Bagshawe

My Review: 2/5

If it was any other book, I would have said its good but I guess I had high expectation from the writer since she dared to write Sidney Sheldon's sequel story. Obviously, its hard to replace the great writer like Sheldon but seriously, people should question themselves thousand times before coming up with story like this. Especially, the following points have left my heart crawling:

1: Lexi's kidnapping is shown as the highlight in the beginning. At 8 years of old, she is shown unbelievably brave and matured. At least I wasn't like that at 8. She is too much affected by the kidnaping incident that she promises herself to punish 'Pig' but later on, I didn’t even know how the 'Pig' died. Was it poisoning? 

2: Lexi and Max in love. I totally didn't get it. They are first cousins from twins sisters. I know it's fiction but just to think about it is so gross!

3: Poor Tara and children are killed so that Gabe could hook up with Lexi. I was just surprised that Lexi didn't sleep with her own brother, Robert. 

4: And annoyingly ending of the book. 
Sidney Sheldon books do seem to end that way but with this book, there was just too many how? when? why? where? Ok woman, at least come up with a satisfaction conclusion even if you want to leave it for next sequel. Nothing was making sense at the end and the way the book ended, I just wanted to hit someone or something. Seriously! 

Still, I give her 2 stars for her bravery.

Saturday 20 September 2014

Tell me your dreams by Sidney Sheldon


My Review: 3/5

WARNING: If you haven't read this book yet and want to read it, please do not read this review. I am going to bring the suspense out. Only read this review after you have finished reading the book. 


Honestly, I don't know whether I liked this book or not. The book is divided into 3 parts: the first part explains the problem of the main character, Ashley Patterson, who is the victim of Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD). Ashley is accused of murdering 5 men but she doesn’t even know 3 of them. The case goes to the court, which becomes the book’s second part. A lawyer called David, defends Ashley. David is shown as hero here. Actually, the first 2 parts are jaw dropping. I really liked it. Then comes the third part, where the suspense is out and this is where my disappointment lies. So, it turns out that the cause of Ashley’s MPD were actually her parents. Her father was sexually abusing her since 6 years of old and her mother never liked her. She was always criticising Ashley. To protect herself from this situation, her alter ego, Toni Prescott was born. Still, her father continues it and to be able to cope with the suffering, another alter ego, Alette Peters was born. Since then, every time Ashley comes close to a guy, her alter ego Toni takes over and she kills the guy. What I don't understand is, why wasn't the father killed in the first place? I totally didn't get that.